Kaala Akshar Bhains Barabar

The most innovative and hilarious literacy campaign I've ever seen! Check our J and L. I also like how V has been used to discourage 'immorality'.

What fun it would have been if we all had been taught our A B C's this way!

Received via email from Mawkish Rains and Pallavi.

And what stops you?

Boredom, really.

You?

The Ghajini Dilemma

I've been wondering. The protagonist in Ghajini, Sanjay Singhania suffers from short term amnesia. So every fifteen minutes, he forgets everything. Every morning when he wakes up, he has to remind himself that his girlfriend was killed and he relives the whole trauma everytime.



He has reminders like 'Find Ghajini. Kill him' written at random places. But how does he remember why Ghajini is to be killed? And why does he not balk at what must necessarily seem like a strange and cruel message to him, every time the reminder beeps? Surely, the morning's reminders about Kalpana being killed do not last him the day, to justify not being shocked by a reminder to kill someone.

Not This Time

Lyricist Prasoon Joshi wrote this poem after the Mumbai terror attacks. Says the ad guru and film lyricist, "I believe it should reach as many people as possible because it is our collective pain and voice".

Is baar nahin
Is baar jab woh choti si bachchi mere paas apni kharonch le kar aayegi
Main usey phoo phoo kar nahin behlaoonga
Panapney doonga uski tees ko
Is baar nahin

(This time when that little girl comes to me with her bruises, I will not blow gently at her wound, nor distract her, I will let her pain grow.Not this time.)

Is baar jab main chehron par dard likha dekhoonga
Nahin gaoonga geet peeda bhula dene wale
Dard ko risney doonga,utarney doonga andar gehrey
Is baar nahin

(This time when I see pain on facesI will not sing the song that eases pain I will let the pain seep in, deep. Not this time.)

Is baar main na marham lagaoonga
Na hi uthaoonga rui ke phahey
Aur na hi kahoonga ki tum aankein band karlo,
gardan udhar kar lo main dawa lagata hoon
Dekhney doonga sabko hum sabko khuley nangey ghaav
Is baar nahin

(This time I won't apply any balm Nor will I ask you to shut your eyes and turn your head While I gingerly apply medicine I will let everyone see the open, naked woundsNot this time.)

Is baar jab uljhaney dekhoonga,chatpatahat dekhoonga
Nahin daudoonga uljhee door lapetney
Uljhaney doonga jab tak ulajh sake
Is baar nahin

(This time when I see difficulty, uneasinessI will not run to solve the problems I will let them become complicated. Not this time.)

Is baar karm ka hawala de kar nahin uthaoonga auzaar
Nahin karoonga phir se ek nayee shuruaat
Nahin banoonga misaal ek karmyogi ki
Nahin aaney doonga zindagi ko aasani se patri par
Utarney doonga usey keechad main,tedhey medhey raston pe
Nahin sookhney doonga deewaron par laga khoon
Halka nahin padney doonga uska rang
Is baar nahin banney doonga usey itna laachaar
Ki paan ki peek aur khoon ka fark hi khatm ho jaye
Is baar nahin

(This time I won't pick up my tools as a matter of duty, I will not make a new beginning Nor will I stand as an example of one dedicated to my job I will not let life easily return to normalcy I will let it descend into muck, on the twisting paths I will not let the blood on the walls dry out Nor will I let its colour fade away This time I won't let it become so helpless That you can't tell blood from paan-spit. Not this time.)

Is baar ghawon ko dekhna hai
Gaur se
Thoda lambe wakt tak
Kuch faisley
Aur uskey baad hausley
Kahin toh shuruat karni hi hogi
Is baar yahi tay kiya hai

(This time the wounds need to be watched Carefully For a long timeSome decisions are needed And then some brave moves to be made We have to begin somewhereThis time this is what I have resolved)

My 50 for 2008

It's that time of the year again... Time to set some goals and take charge. I'm writing below a list of things I want to achieve in this year. And as I achieve each or when I set a new goal, I want to keep coming back here and updating this list.

1. Come to office by 9:30 a.m. at least 4 days out of 5.
2. Leave office by 7:30 p.m. at least 3 days out of 5. This is the lower limit. I want to go home early every day.
3. Call either of my grandmothers every week.
4. Set a daily task list - either as soon as I come to office or before going home the previous day, preferably the latter.
5. Get a car before my birthday!
6. Get a driver's license before I get a car.
7. Get gifts/sweets for the watchmen in the apartment house.
8. Be more aggressive in terms of work-productivity.
9. Log off from gmail and gtalk for two hours everyday. Can be relaxed when there's no work.
10. Lose 2 inches off my waist.
11. Find half an hour to read something other than the newspaper everyday.
12. Avoid washing my hair with hard water.
13. Join and complete a photography course.
14. Get a back massage every time I need it.
15. Do a painting every month.
16. Go on at least 50% of the treks organized by the Trekkers Club.
17. Apply face-pack every fortnight.
18. Take a holiday with my parents.
19. Take a holiday with my friends.
20. Visit home at least once in 3-4 months.
21. Read all of these books.
22. Clean cobwebs everytime they can be seen.
23. Call up atleast one of my uncles/aunts/cousins (Pallu not included)/long lost friends every week.
24. Remember birthdays.
25. Acquire and maintain toned arms and legs.
26. Don't buy new clothes untill the wardrobe is cleared of the old.
27. Do a favor for someone who doesn't know me and has no clue I have helped.
28. Drink 10 glasses of water everyday.
29. Write on Rant Factory once a month.
30. Remove nail-paint as soon as it starts chipping. Keep nails clean and trimmed.
31. Buy a good pair of jeans in a sale.
32. Apply sunscreen!
33. Go to meet my school teachers - Mrs. Pant, Mrs. Rao, Mrs. Kumaran.
34. Learn swimming.
35. Learn how to make Dosas.
36. Have breakfast everyday
37. Make a monthly budget and stick to it.
38. Buy a couple of good stocks that can be retained on a long term basis.
39. Cut out on junk food.
40. Take mom and dad for a complete physical check-up.
41. Get a dental check-up done.
42. Learn to use Photoshop.
43. Put a watermark on all published pictures.
44. Learn to do the hoola-hoop.
45. Listen to music more often.
46. Watch more movies on DVD.
47. Keep updating this list.
48. Visit the spa.
49. Visit an orphanage and an old-age home.
50. Pray.

2008, here I come!

Need a read

A list of books that I want to read in 2008.

1. A Thousand Splendid Suns - Done 18/01/2008
2. Maximum City
3. Freakonomics
4. Harry Potter I - VII - Done 23/07/2008
5. The Subtle Knife
6. The Amber Spyglass
7. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance
8. Lila
9. The Small Woman - Done 26/07/2008
10. Far from the Madding Crowd
11. Cash Flow Quadrant
12. Lipika
13. Geetanjali
14. Julius Ceasar
15. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Done sometime in Feb
16. Tuesdays With Morrie - Done 08/09/2008
17. Madhushala
18. Madhubala
19. Madhukalash
20. Eragon - Done sometime in Nov
21. Eldest - Done sometime in Nov
22. Crime and Punishment
23. Blink - Done sometime in Feb
24. Shantaram - Done sometime in Aug
25. 1984 - Done 06/09/2008
26. Fountainhead
27. Evening Class - Done sometime in Oct

Poetic genius

I found a priceless treasure today, all thanks to the cleaning up that mom made me do (so I guess I should actually be thankful to her, instead of cribbing about all the 'child labour'...)

This old treasure is a thin little pocket diary sans its cover... the pages have yellowed, and I can't quite place it's date, except that its atleast 15 years old. In a very bad handwriting, it has in it, a poem scrawled in ink... without further preamble, let me just present it to you.

Bewakoof Prajakta

Ek ladki thi Miss Prajakta

Na usse tha kuchh aata jaata

Waise usse marathi ka period tha bhaata

Specially jab teacher hoti Mrs. Nivedita

Uska har ek joke hota tha flop

Phir bhi kehti 'I'm top'

Uski bewakoofi ka na tha ek bhi stop

Intelligence ka na ugta uske brain mein crop

Poets ne usspar poetry banaii

Phir bhi uske brain par bewakoofi thii chhaaii

Woh karti bas apni badhai

Aakhir ek din uski bewakoofi rang laaii

Ek din shuru kiya usne doosron ko kaatna

Shukr hai nahin chaha kisi ko chaatna

Yehi dukh humein hai doosron ko baantna

Log uske liye lage naamon ko chhaatna

Koi kehta woh hai crocodile

Koi kehta woh maarti hai crow ki style

Main kehti hoon uski hai bandar jaisi smile

Usski report banati hoon main file by file

Kabhi na hoga iss poem ka khaatma

Kyunki bewakoofi na chhodegi uski aatma

Yehi hai iss poem ka climax

Jiske liye loongi main sabse tax

I kid you not, people. This is for real. I know this was written sometime back in school, but darned if I can remember who wrote it. I admit with some regret that the handwriting is not mine. I have a sneaking suspicion though, that this might be the work of the over-fertile imaginations of more than one mind, and that the writing merely belongs to the person who put it to paper.

Weren't we just perfectly horrid when we were kids? And very happy being so, if I recall correctly... I remember vividly how we teased and harassed the subject of this poetry, Prajakta, and feel a little hot behind the ears about it, at the moment. I called up Meenal to read this out loud to her, soon as I finished laughing my head off about it (so that I could begin again, of course). We both agreed that we were wicked and horrible and completely hateful to her, the poor thing, but we couldn't really help cracking up over this! This is a very insufficient apology, and one that I'm sure will never reach the intended recepient, and I hope, also unnecessary and that she has forgotten and forgiven all this!

Does anyone remember who wrote this? This is an open appeal to all the other girls to tell me, if they happen to read this and remember anything...

Chasing the Clouds

I have been away from here for too long. I kept telling myself that I was posting, that I was keeping the blog ‘alive’… but when I read through the previous few posts, I knew I was kidding myself. Not one of them is my thought, not one of them, me. And today I was filled with this intense desire to write… write about? I didn’t know then when this feeling hit, and I had to keep it at bay long enough to get through the day’s work and get home where I’d have some privacy, and I don’t know now, when I’m sitting in front of my PC. But write - I want to.

Oh hell, I might as well be truthful. I tried my best to drown this unrest in me. I watched TV, I called up friends, but I could concentrate on neither. I knew then that I had to write today… I have been to so tied up in things for the past few weeks, that I’ve barely acknowledged this side of me, barely remembered the pleasure I get through writing. There’s a goal to achieve and work to be done, and the flowers can wait till next year, and the music must hold on too. Today, I must run, and not pause to ask what I am running for, lest I lose the reason to run. And to stop running is to get run-over and to accept defeat. Right now, anything but defeat….

But maybe today I can pause? To close my eyes and lose myself in the things I enjoy, if not to ask what I’m running for? Surely, that much I can risk… I struggle to find an answer… I wish I knew. I wish I could decide one way, without feeling guilty about abandoning the other. All my life, I’ve wanted to avoid these guilt traps, for I know them for what they are. And in spite of being so aware of their guile, I’ve only rarely been able to avoid them. It’s not easy. And yet, if I am to find pure pleasure in anything – success or leisure, I must rise above them.

My mind is running amok, like a calf released from its pen after being tied down for a long long time. Very like the calf, it’s chasing the clouds, never concentrating on one… a thought comes, and the mind follows it for a while, till it sees another more interesting one, and it abandons the first… and the second is soon deserted for a third and then a fourth and a fifth… till I don’t even remember where I began and what I started out to say. There’s so much that has been waiting to be said, it’s quite a revelation! Maybe there’s still hope for this blog… maybe I haven’t run out of things to say!

And some more...

There are two essential rules to management. One, the customer is always right; and two, they must be punished for their arrogance.

"All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher."--Ambrose Bierce

Aim above morality. Be not simply good, be good for something.

More smartass status messages

Status messages series contd...

"Humanity is just a cracked egg. And the omelet stinks"

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure